It’s that time of the month! The time where shops go crazy with the couple discounts, cute desserts and everything that would make a single person gag. So, of course, to celebrate this occasion, I requested a dear friend of mine to write up a piece about this amazing day.
S/he decided to stay anonymous, rightfully so. Take a peek at this amazing piece of writing which takes an unexpected turn.
I’m sitting here, computer on my desk and a condensing beer next to me, wondering what on earth I could write for this blog that would interest anyone. As research, I’ve scoured the many posts already published on this blog. I’ve looked at them for tips on what to write and how to write and what kind of audience I’m supposed to write for.
I haven’t found a definite answer yet and now the deadline is approaching.
So I’ve decided to write down a short, stream-of-consciousness post. You’ve seen these kinds of videos on YouTube, presumably, where a self-important vlogger sits in front of you and talks about anything that crosses their mind. I’m going to attempt to do the same.
Originally, this post was supposed to be about Valentine’s Day and touch on the concepts of equality, love, freedom and accepting everyone for who they are and who they love.
But after brainstorming for a long time, I realized that having had not a single relationship in all my life so far, as old as I feel, I don’t really know enough about love and freedom to write about them. Wasn’t it some famous writer who said, “How can you sit down to write when you’ve not stood up to live?”
So now you, the ever curious and interested readers, are stuck with a stupid and ultimately meaningless post about nothing.
Actually, I just did think of something I feel I should write about. Having lived all of 22 years, perhaps there are some things I feel I should talk about and discuss, behind the veil of anonymity that Poornima has so kindly granted me.
It’s already February of 2018 and most everyone’s New Year’s resolutions are probably forgotten and wasting away at the backs of their minds. So screw New Year’s resolutions. Let’s start monthly resolutions and *resolve* to stop caring so much about what everyone thinks about you.
Stop going to the gym because it will get ‘the ladies’ looking at you or that cute guy will finally be able to see your butt through your leggings. Stop buying new clothes to look like everyone else or because you want everyone else to look at you. Don’t watch that new film simply because all your friends told you to.
That café everyone’s raving about? Who cares?
Do things because YOU want to. Note the capitalization. At some point in your lives, there’s going to come a time when you grow up, and I say this because no one stops growing up. Even octogenarians (80 year olds) continue learning and growing and changing. And when you grow up and out, you’re going to lose friends and parts of your life you thought you’d never lose. And if you had spent your whole life up to that point doing everything because of other people, you’re going to come up hard against the realization that your life isn’t yours anymore.
You’ve lived a half-life.
I’m not calling on you to give up caring and feeling for your friends and family. Keep doing that. God knows we need more of that these days. But living your life as everyone else does, according to someone else’s rules and patterns? Well, as a great protagonist of one of my favorite books once said, “you’re a phony” (shout out to whoever gets this reference).
This post isn’t some know-it-all rant about how everyone I know cares too much or, conversely, cares too little. This post is about me trying to get myself, as much as anyone else, to let go of what other people expect of me. I’ve not been the greatest at living my life own life either. Many times I’ve simply faded back into the furniture because that’s what people expected of me and wanted me to do.
And I’ve grown up with that feeling of being not important for so long that the very idea of “doing my own thing” fills me with nervous jitters. But I know I have to do it. I know when I walk into an interview, as much as I hate the whole concept of them, that I can’t be a carbon copy of the person who walked in before me.
It’s hard to let go sometimes. And most times, it’s the hardest thing you’ll ever do. It’s definitely the hardest thing I’ll ever do. But on the other side of that “I-don’t-give-a-flying-f***” mindset lies a whole other world.
The takeaway from this pretentious, over-blown post? Do what you want. Make cool shit. Write, watch films, eat new food, listen to new music, experiment with fashion, love your friends and family, love someone new, love someone old, listen to people talk, change your hair color, eat a whole pizza AND a kottu not because everyone else is doing them but because somewhere inside your very own being, you know you want to.
That is all.
I hope you guys enjoyed that piece of writing and if you are to take anything out of it… do love yourself and be yourself – be it weird, full of quirks, nerdy or even a snob. Be yourself and love yourself. You can’t love someone else, if you don’t love yourself first.
On that note, I end this post by wishing everyone a Happy Valentine’s Day!
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